Patti LuPone just visited the tea-spilling convention that is Watch What Happens Live with Andy Cohen, and it sounds like she probably won't be petitioning Madonna to play Madonna in the Madonna biopic Madonna's angry about. The winner of two Tonys and two GRAMMYs finds Madge to be, flat-out, "a movie killer."

She elaborated:

"She’s dead behind the eyes, she cannot act her way out of a paper bag. She should not be in film or onstage. She’s a wonderful performer for what she does, but she is not an actress. Bing!"

Will no one stand up for A League of Their Own, at least?

The topic came up since LuPone, 68, and Ms. Ciccone, 58, have both starred as Eva Perón in Evita. LuPone saw Madonna sing one of the numbers when she was on the treadmill once and thought it was "a piece of shit." In 1980, LuPone took the Best Actress in a Musical Tony while the show raked in six more trophies. In '97, Alan Parker's film got just one Oscar, Best Original Song, out of five noms. Madonna did win the Golden Globe for Best Actress in a Musical or Comedy, though.

The Queen of Pop's last starring role in a film was 2002's Swept Away, directed by then-husband Guy Ritchie. Funnily enough, there's no shortage of people essentially accusing Ritchie of being a movie killer with their King Arthur reviews.