March 9, 2012


Chris Brown Gets Unexpectedly Honest On Freestyle Rap

Thursday night Chris Brown excitedly tweeted a new song he released online, a freestyle rap called "How I Feel." The title itself was a tip-off that Breezy would be saying exactly what's on his mind, but most of us weren't expecting a track as personal and confessional as this. It touches on everything from seeing his mother abused as he grew up, to abusing erstwhile girlfriend Rihanna himself, to what he perceives as the media's unfair coverage of him. 

Here are some of the most salient verses from "How I Feel":

"I live my life with no regrets, I try to show respect but you don't get it"

"It might take me a lifetime to take it back / And it might take a lifetime for you to know the facts"

"All alone sleeping in my bedroom, as I wet cheeks / Momma gonna be dead soon / Cuz a man beat her, but he don't realize she important to this family like a f--king heirloom"

"But I ain't never gonna do no 60 Minute interview, cuz all you wanna do is twist my words up / And all I wanna do is flip my birds up"

"Nineteen, a n---- went through a tragedy / Three years a n---- just found a better me"

NOTE: Brown was 19 when he assaulted Rihanna and it's been three years since. But you have to wonder, was he the one who went through a tragedy?

"Nightmares, feeling haunted / Thinking 'Do I really like this star shit?' / Because fame ain't freedom"

"So I'ma keep on living my life from day to day / Learn from my mistakes"

It's probably worth pointing out that the line "I live my life with no regrets" is kinda the opposite of "I learn from my mistakes." But that's the fascinating thing with freestyle raps like this one—unlike album tracks, there's no (or less) PR oversight from the label. So oftentimes we get a glimpse into the contradictory thoughts of a real person vs. the controlled image of a star.

What do you think about Chris Brown's freestyle rap? Does it show that he's still not taking what he did to Rihanna seriously enough, or does it reveal a matured man who is trying to move on? Tell us what you think below.