July 20, 2012


Biggie Musical Writers Stole Books, Hid Getaway Key in Rectum

Adger Cowans
Adger Cowans

Update: According to Allhiphop.com, the estate of Notorious B.I.G. have denied any connection to the planned Biggie musical. "Please note that this is an unauthorized play," said an estate representative. "Our firm has previously sent a cease and desist notice and any association with the Estate of Christopher Wallace or Notorious B.I.G. are unauthorized."

This may be the weirdest Biggie Smalls news I've ever read: According to the Connecticut Post, two men who were writing a rap musical about Biggie's life called "Ready 2 Die" (which sounds awesome), were charged with stealing more than $800 worth of books from a Barnes & Noble in Westport, CT. Sounds strange but not absurd, right? I'll get there.

When the police arrived, they found the suspects near a locked Jaguar with the books in plain sight in the car. The books included nine copies of "Fifty Shades of Grey," three copies of "Soula Coaster: The Diary of Me" by R. Kelly and only one copy of a book called "Murder Mamas." The two men were brought into custody, where one of them told the police that the key would probably be in the other suspect's rectum.

And it was.

Police found the key inside some tissue within the other suspect's rectum and used the key to open the car and recover the stolen merchandise.

Anyway, the "Ready 2 Die" musical was supposed to premiere in March, although that might now be in doubt. Would you still see it? Let us know in the comments!