INDIO, CA - APRIL 12: Singer Karen O of the Yeah Yeah Yeahs performs onstage during day 1 of the 2013 Coachella Valley Music
Karl Walter

"I've only almost gone over the side of the highway like three to five times," - A native Los Angelino explaining the perils of car culture 

"Hey man, get off your phone. I'm standing right here, you want a [traffic] ticket? Dumbass..." - A friendly traffic cop outside of the festival

"Should we just go to Alt-J?" - Japandroids fans during their longer than expected sound check 

"Wanna meet by the Ferris wheel?" - Everyone

"What the f-ck, dude?" - Bro
"Bro!" - Dude 

"This song is about L-O-V-E... LOVE!" Yeah Yeah Yeahs' Karen O before shredding through "Maps"

"I kill this song on the drums when we play this on Rock Band," - A Yeah Yeah Yeahs fan and Brian Chase wannabe

"I really feel like marriage is supposed to be a best friendship," - Deep thoughts in line for the Ferris wheel

"What the f-ck is up, Coachellaaaaaa!" - Earl Sweatshirt approximately 15 times

"What's up, Earl? Westside!!" - How Tyler, the Creator says hi to his friend Earl Sweatshirt

"No, I brought the Chanels," - A festivalgoer slumming it by bringing her "crappy" sunglasses

"It's our first show in six years! They let us out!" - Violent Femmes

"Wait, what's a gyro?" - A girl who lives the saddest life ever. (She's never had a gyro?!)

"This is f-cking EDM! And I am so happy!" - Benni Benassi during his set. (We believed him.)

"You should all be kissing by now for God's sake!" - Jessie Ware halfway through performing "Sweet Talk"

"I just had an orgasm at Paul Oakenfold," - Someone who really, really likes Paul Oakenfold

"Last year it was cold but it wasn't this windy," - Truest story ever

"My brother wrote the movie How High," - Oh, the people you'll meet in VIP

"I feel like I'm in Lawrence of Arabia," - Red Hot Chili Peppers' Flea on the crazy dust storm that closed out Coachella