November 11, 2013


Justin Bieber Accidentally Defines Past Week With New Song "All Bad"

Days after launching his latest music video "I Can't Believe You Filmed Me While I Was Sleeping," Justin Bieber released "All Bad," the latest entry in his weekly #MusicMonday series.

It's an ironic title for the R&B slow jam, as the singer contracted food poisoning in Argentina during the South American leg of his tour. No word on if some jealous Argentinian husband, in a fit of passion and rage, poisoned the Biebz for blowing a kiss at his wife, but let's assume that's how it happened.

"Ooh, you know females/And how they like to run their mouths," Bieber sings, presumably mimicking the opening of the confidentiality agreement he's given to his South American harem. With female mouths already run, all JB can do is sing earnestly and make impassioned, depressed emoticon cover art.

It hasn't been the best week for the singer, who was kicked out of an Argentinian hotel and accused of illegally painting graffiti in Brazil. Let's just assume there's no chance of anything remotely tabloid-y happening when the singer hits his next show in Santiago, Chile.