June 11, 2015

Listicle

Weekly Prescription: Your Bonnaroo Dosage for June 11

#1Ailment: Neuro Glitch

You're in a hurry because you want to get home in time to clean up the hurricane of clothes that is your apartment before your date comes over. However, you have to make this quick stop for toilet paper and wine or that mess isn't going to matter anyway. You've got the goods in hand, plus some ripe strawberries (yum) and you're anxious for the cashier to move just a little bit faster. You reach into your pocket, wait. You try your other pocket. Nooooooo. You forgot your wallet. The hungry, tired and frustrated customers in line glare at you, and now you have to run back to your car. Relax. You'll get through this.

Drug name: Busparon Drugs

Active ingredients: The lyrics "under the pressure" with the paradox of the energetic, spaced-out rhythm and the beachy guitar jams.

Uses: To diminish your anxiety about being forgetful and replace the pressure with the impetus to get moving and start the night off right.

Directions: Play once as you drive home to relax your nerves. Play once as you throw all your clothes into the closet to hide them for the night. You got this.

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