Music is a source of comfort and catharsis for most people, so we stocked our musical pharmacy with some tunes to cure your ailments. From home sick to heart sick, check with us weekly for new musical prescriptions.
Ailment: Drug seduction
It's late and the party is at high speed. You've had a few drinks and as you head to the bathroom a stylish couple compliments your outfit and offers you some illegal substances. You're feeling tipsy, a little drowsy and a little line could do the trick...hold your horses, Scarface. You know very well that you are going to hate yourself in the morning and you don't even know these people. Who knows what they're giving you and what you're going to look like after a sniffle? Didn't your mother ever teach you not to take things from strangers?
Drug name: Detowxio
Active ingredients: Both slick and gritty, high-energy beats juxtaposed with Towkio's wailing vocals "Cocaine, on the mirror, see yourself / Look at you, look at you."
Uses: The energetic beat and abrasive vocals are the perfect allusion to the morning after your bad decisions and give you the opportunity to reflect on your bad decisions before you make them and end up regretting them later.
Directions: Step outside. Play once at high volume and watch accompanying visuals. If that doesn't work, repeat dose until ingredients take effect and the beat is enough to move you.
Warning: If Detowxio isn't potent enough, seek non-musical medical attention.
Do you have an ailment you need a cure for? Write us at email@example.com with your sickness, story and handle so we can respond with a musical fix.